TO FRIENDS AND FAMILY OF SOMEONE STRUGGLING WITH THEIR SEXUALITY:
The best thing you can do for someone who is questioning their orientation is to love them as if nothing has changed, because they are the same person they always have been. If a blind person gains sight, the world they see upon opening their eyes is the same world they have always lived in. The difference is that they can now understand and appreciate it in a way they haven’t been able.
So I’ve been in a little cottage on an island for the last three days for a personal retreat and writing retreat. Okay, it was a big island with lots of other people on it, but I had no direct contact with said people other than a couple instances of paying for things.
I don’t think I realized until I was actually in the middle of it that I’ve never done that before, but I will definitely be doing it again. Some stuff I learned:
Regular life can’t be like a retreat and it probably shouldn’t be, but I think I can take some of this info about how I work and integrate it into my routines.
But yes, sometimes, even now, we still think about quitting music and writing. I overheard someone say, There comes a moment in your darkest hour when you realize what will save you is the thing you’ve been doing your whole life.
And in this case, it seems to ring true. When we imagine reinventing our lives, we start dreaming about what we care about, and before too long, we end up back where we started.
When Karin and I picked the guitars back up recently, and sat down at the piano and started playing through the songs to get ready for our upcoming dates, we realized the music began to work on us again. The songs have a way of nudging us toward the people we want to be.